whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
