Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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