yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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