don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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