i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
