Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
you have to choose: penises or morals?
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
