We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Don't EVER smell your tampon
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
