Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
