its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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