Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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