So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
The ass gains better be worth it
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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