he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
