Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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