Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize