i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
