Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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