The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
What a dumb baby whore.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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