i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
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