Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
