i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
