the condom got lost in my hair
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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