the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
