I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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