could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
