idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
