dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Randomize