If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
