Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
