If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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