My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize