I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
FUCK WHALES
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