I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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