I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Randomize