is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
