i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
