My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
This is the high leading the old right now
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
