where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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