i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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