You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
