so let's talk penis.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize