we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
