We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
