is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
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