so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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