dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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