He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
