We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
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