We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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