If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
