Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
honey bunches of taint.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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